Friday, June 27, 2008

Lessons of Love..

Another great story for you, people!

*** Specially for the one, who keeps going away from me ***

My husband is a Bank Examiner by profession. I love him for his steady nature, and I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders.
Three years of courtship and now, two years into marriage, I would have to admit that I am getting tired of it.
My reason for loving him before has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness. I am sentimental and extremely sensitive when it comes to relationships and feelings. I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy.
My husband is my complete opposite. His lack of sensitivity and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage have disheartened me about love.
One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce. “Why?” he asked, shocked. “I am tired; there are no reasons for everything in the world!” I answered.
He kept silent the whole night. He seemed to be in deep thought with a lighted cigarette at all times. My feeling of disappointment only increased - here was a man who can’t even express his predicament. What else can I hope from him?
And finally he asked me, “What can I do to change your mind?”
Somebody said it right; it’s hard to change a person’s personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.
Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered, “Here is the question. If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind. Let’s say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?”
He said, “I will give you my answer tomorrow . . . . .” My hopes just sank by listening to his response . . . . .
I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes . . . . .
“My dear, I would not pick that flower for you, but please allow me to explain the reasons further . . . . .”
This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading . . . . .
“When you use the computer you always mess up the software programs, and you cry in front of the screen. I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.
“You always leave the house keys behind, thus, I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.
“You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city; I have to save my eyes to show you the way.
“You always have the cramps whenever your “good friend” approaches every month; I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy.
“You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.
“You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails, and help to remove those annoying white hairs so I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand… and tell you the color of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face . . . . .”
“Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do… I could not pick that flower yet, and die . . . . .”
My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting . . . . .and as I continue on reading . . . . .
“Now, that you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk . . . . .”
I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread . . . . .
Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone . . . . .

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

My Moon....

Watching out through the window…
Gazing the moon unblinkingly …
An innocent tear rolled out…
And then another and then another….
I thought I was relieved but it felt the same…
An urge to be with you under the same moon…
An urge to be complete with you…
An urge to fulfill the dreams we shared…
An urge of breaking the silence to hear you say I love you….
I miss you all the more each day...
I may not be able to guarantee happiness but can make happiness possible…

Some thing which I shared to the moon,
"I want to stay in you forever…
I can no longer take this pain…
I am just waiting for that lucky moment
to unite with your heart, when you breathe my love in . . .”.

When you miss me look at the moon because I will be looking at the same moon….

Monday, June 09, 2008

Last post !! Good bye

I am suffering from a disease and don't know its cure. I might be contacting doctors or may be just keeping it with myself, No hard feeling... no nothing... it can't be cured I know it myself!!

Just take very good care of yourself, the way I cared !!

Won't be blogging anymore !!

Friday, June 06, 2008


Expectation !

Sitting on an office chair and looking at an imaginary roof, just thinking what’s wrong with me.
Why I am not happy.. why I am not able to keep her happy? What is there which keeps bothering me and her every time. Then after lot of churning the forth came up and named it as Expectation.
Every day I wake up with a willingness to improve, improve for her, with her, by her, all for her happiness through our mutual effort. She has always been with me but I am not able to set her free the way she wants and in the same way I want to be caged in her arms forever but she is not able to do that either.
I don’t why things are getting strange with our self. I don’t know (her favorite word) but something is wrong with the relationship. I want to keep my relationship intact and strong and as my baby (as she says). I keep questioning keep running from post to pillar every time to keep her close to me .... Do I do enough to keep her close to me?.... or is there anything I am missing ??
I wish I could do something miraculous but unfortunately I can’t..... All I can say I really love you and I will change for our self and will love you the most and I miss you a lot ..
She keeps on saying that I expect a lot and with God’s grace she is able to deliver her best. But what keeps bothering her and me is that “yeh dil maange more”
With an urge to improve myself I keep going through lot of stuff to read related to expectation and once I read that when you start you expect a lot and all you get is nothing .......
I expect her to care the same the way I care for her but ?....I guess no one is perfect .... There are some negative and positive in each and every person .... Instead of having everything in your mind ... you can try to change ... Change for someone... Change for good.
I love you and I want you to be mine.

Sunday, June 01, 2008

June Weather

Hi Folks,
Sunny Weather... Cloudy Weather...
Everything is so unpredictable in this June.

Don't know when it starts raining and don't know when it is Sunny and Cloudy.

Can't predict much .. just enjoy it every time ....
Till then C ya.. Keep coming back !!